Thursday, March 28, 2019

Another Song

I know that these things aren't actually songs, they're riffs at most. I've got to record them, get them onto YouTube, because the way that I sing them is a lot of the overall flavor, as we hip-hop artists call it. (You may have noticed that I don't write out the melodies in these blog posts. That's because I can't write melodies. The only way I can hear a melody that's written down is to actually play it on a musical instrument. And no, I can't play it right out after the first look. Not even close.)

People who've known me all my life and heard me sing may find this hard to believe, but I've actually gotten a lot better at singing in the past year or so. Turns out that the missing piece of the puzzle was PRACTICE, lots of it. Who knew that doing something over and over, again and again, could eventually make you better at it?

Some of the time when I sing I'm making fun of the way other people sing, and some of the time I'm sincerely trying my best to sound good, with no irony or sarcasm. It has occurred to me that if anyone is listening, they may think I'm being completely serious all of the time. This amuses me very much. "You know Mr Bollinger, that great big old guy who lives over there? Well, I can hear him singing sometimes. And part of the time he sounds alright, and part of the time he sounds, just... really WEIRD. Like a really bad 1970's rocker or something."

Anyway, here's my new song, or riff. This is one of the times when I'm mocking other musicians. When you read the lyrics, try to hear a fast-tempo, mid-1970's hard rock riff in your head:

Shake ya hands like a MORON, Baby/Shake ya hands like a moron (repeat endlessly)

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