Saturday, October 5, 2013

Hold The Phone, I Just Got Some IMPORTANT News:

Patek Philippe makes pocket watches! Here and now! They make new ones!


I can't find any prices on the Patek Philippe website. Yeah, I find that sort of thing obnoxious. Sort of like restaurants without prices on their menus. No, I've never been to such a restaurant, only heard about them. Yes, I realize there's no way I can afford to buy anything from Patek Philippe. But it would be nice to have the information. Information is what websites are for. And menus, too, you pretentious schmucks.

Ah, I see the website does has information about the prices to have Patek Phillipe watches serviced at Authorized Service Centers. (They capitalize it, just like that: Servicing your Patek Philippe at an Authorized Service Center is not as expensive as you may imagine.) It's not cheaper than I imaged: $130 to change a battery. $1050 and up to service mechanical watches. The price to service an especially-complicated new Patek Philippe mechanical watch, or a Patek Phillipe that's more than 20 years old -- that is to say, "from the classic collection" : "estimate." Refused estimates cost $130.

Do they really have to charge for refused estimates? Was that really a big problem before they started charging for it?

Anyhoo, according to some other websites, a new Patek Philippe pocket watch with an 18K yellow-gold case can be had for under 40 grand. You know what? I don't know. The Patek Philippe website put me off just a bit, with no prices given for the watches (unless the prices are there and I missed them somehow) and absurd prices given for repairs. If this blog suddenly blows up and starts getting millions of hits a day, generating thousands of dollars a day for me, not counting book deals and other revenue streams which would follow the instant I no longer needed them, because the world is ab-so-lute-ly backwards in some ways, I don't know if I'll want a new Patek Philippe pocket watch. If I did get a Patek Philippe, new or "classic," I'm about 100% certain I could find a craftsman somewhere who'd be perfectly able and willing to service it just as well as an Authorized Service Center, or better, and charge less. You know what? Maybe I'd pay him more than he charged. Maybe I'd pay him Patek Philippe's rates, and then talk about that on Conan, just to shove it in Patek Philippe's pretentious faces.

Don't worry, I'm going to cool down and think about all of this for a while. Because it may be a mistake to judge the entire watchmaking company based on their website. Just recently I pointed out on this blog that I find the Bibliothèque nationale de France to be magnificent overall, while I find their website to be less than magnificent. Perhaps it's likewise unfair to judge Patek Philippe by their website. It's really not as if I'm an expert in high-end watches.

Hmm, I don't see any pocket watches on Rolex' website.

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