-- and I got an email confirmation that I can attend a hearing by phone and my lawn is shaggy and there are people doing lawnwork all up and down the block!!!
AND I HALF-ASSED MOWED MY LAWN! And half-assed is about as good as I can do unless I really stay on it all the time because I have a non-motorized mower and I haven't been staying on it all the time and people have been saying hello and I grimace back at them, I'm not annoyed at them, on the contrary, they're being nice and that's nice, but I worry that my attempts to smile back look more like grimaces cause they sure feel that way, cause I'm overstimulated and bright sunshine is so oppressive to me, most people if they're affected by the amount of sunshine get depressed in the winter time by the lack of sunlight, I'm the opposite, a little sunshine goes a long way for me, I go outside for jusr a little while and already I'm tanned and I'm DONE, BUT THE SUN KEEPS SHINING ARRRRGGG!!!! and I try to keep reminding myself that this kind of day is wonderful for most people, and to be glad for them, and that I have to try to be there for them in the winter when they're depressed from the lack of light and I'm fired up because it's my kind of weather.
So many people really are so nice and they understand when I talk about how I get all wound up and overstimulated like this, or even if they don't understand, they try too, and that's nice.
1) Keep reminding myself about all the nice people all over the place.
2) Keep trying to be one of them.
3) Try very, very hard to relax.
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